Wednesday, May 2, 2012

The Bystanders! They Continue To Do Nothing! (Stick Figures in Peril!)


Stick Figure society. We all know how famously and brutally cold-hearted it can be. So terrible. But so true.

It's been exhaustively proven: There's narry a drop of genuine kindness or compassion in the heart of your average Stick Figure for the well-being of others.

(This is likely the case, at least in part, because Stick Figures do not actually contain "hearts." Or drops of anything, for that matter. Their locomotion is achieved largely through a rudimentary system of interconnected air bladders. Science.)

I digress.

The point is, this utter lack of empathy is particularly tragic when the "others" in question happen to be fellow Stick Figures.

And more particularly tragic when those fellow Stick Figures are in the process of commuting.

And most particularly tragic when those fellow Stick Figures in the process of commuting are also currently in Peril.

"A little help?"

Nope. Sorry, pal. You'll get no help here.

You'll be met with nothing but blank stares as you meet your grisly and easily preventable demise.

There's no getting around it. You're getting scissored into chum.

And nobody will bat an eye.

Even if they had eyes.

Which they do not.



It's Sticktown, Jake.



Till next we meet ...

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