Monday, October 7, 2013

Nap Or Crime Scene: Criminally Minded


HOTCHNER (sternly)
The Un-Sub covered the body.

PRENTISS
A clear sign of remorse.

HOTCHNER (sternly)
He may have known the victim.

MORGAN (handsomely)
Have I mentioned that I'm very handsome?

HOTCHNER (sternly)
Yes, Morgan.

JOE MANTEGNA
MANGIA ITALIANO!

HOTCHNER (sternly)
Joe, we're supposed to be in character now.

JOE MANTEGNA
MOLTO BENE!

(JOE MANTEGNA ties on a red and white checkered bib, produces a bowl of pasta and dances gleefully away, eating.)

(HOTCHNER sighs and shakes his head sternly.)

REED
Did you know frogs have teeth, but toads have a bony ridge?

HOTCHNER (sternly)
The Un-Sub is not a frog.

REED
But he may have a bony ridge.

HOTCHNER (sternly)
He doesn't.

REED
I've never eaten a single thing ever.

(MORGAN'S phone rings.)

MORGAN (answering handsomely)
You're on speaker, Baby Girl.

GARCIA (over speaker phone)
Inappropriate sexual innuendo!

(Everyone smiles and pretends this is acceptable workplace behavior.)

JJ
Does it help if I bat my eyelashes?

HOTCHNER (sternly)
It doesn't.

JJ
Then my work here is done.

PRENTISS
Did you guys happen to notice that the body is lightly snoring?



HOTCHNER (sternly)
Tell the Sheriff we're ready to give the profile.




Till next we meet ...

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