Now You're Being Cooked With Gas! (Stick Figures In Peril!)

The eternal question.

We've all wondered it. Pondered it. Dreamed it. Mused aloud about it during staff meetings. Had it tattooed on the lower backs of our indentured servants ...

You know the one:

"Which part of my house is MOST Perilous for Stick Figures?"

And the answer is obvious. Why, it's the Utility Room, of course!

For the Stick Figure, the Utility Room is little more than a bloody charnel house full of sadness and blighted, smoldering death.

1) First off, there are deadly carbon monoxide fumes that will inevitably be greedily gulped down by the hapless Stick Figure into his single-chambered lung-stomach.

And doom, of course, follows hard thereupon.

"OH NO! MY LUNG-STOMACH!"

2) Next, of course, there's the seemingly innocent act of hand washing. What could go wrong there?

As it turns out ...

EVERYTHING!


A single blast of "HOT" will immediately reduce the Stick Figure's hands to useless, pulpy blood-stumps.

Tragically, this poor fellow will never play the Stick Harpsichord again. And that, friends, is a loss for all of us.

"OH NO! HOT MAKE BURN!"

3) Thirdly (and perhaps most Perilously), is the ever-present and inescapable threat of "FLAMMABLE VAPORS." The Stick Figure must avoid these at all costs.

"Why," you ask?


BECAUSE HOLY FUCKING SHIT I'M ON FIRE THAT'S WHY!!!


Till next we meet ...