Whoa.

I don't even see the Matrix code anymore. All I see is blonde, brunette, redhead, subway car window ...

I am The One.

Apparently.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go kick Hugo Weaving repeatedly in the face.



Till next we meet ...

Nap Or Crime Scene: Criminally Minded

HOTCHNER (sternly)

The Un-Sub covered the body.

PRENTISS

A clear sign of remorse.

HOTCHNER (sternly)

He may have known the victim.

MORGAN (handsomely)

Have I mentioned that I'm very handsome?

HOTCHNER (sternly)

Yes, Morgan.

JOE MANTEGNA

MANGIA ITALIANO!

HOTCHNER (sternly)

Joe, we're supposed to be in character now.

JOE MANTEGNA

MOLTO BENE!

(JOE MANTEGNA ties on a red and white checkered bib, produces a bowl of pasta and dances gleefully away, eating.)

(HOTCHNER sighs and shakes his head sternly.)

REED

Did you know frogs have teeth, but toads have a bony ridge?

HOTCHNER (sternly)

The Un-Sub is not a frog.

REED

But he may have a bony ridge.

HOTCHNER (sternly)

He doesn't.

REED

I've never eaten a single thing ever.

(MORGAN'S phone rings.)

MORGAN (answering handsomely)

You're on speaker, Baby Girl.

GARCIA (over speaker phone)

Inappropriate sexual innuendo!

(Everyone smiles and pretends this is acceptable workplace behavior.)

JJ

Does it help if I bat my eyelashes?

HOTCHNER (sternly)

It doesn't.

JJ

Then my work here is done.

PRENTISS

Did you guys happen to notice that the body is lightly snoring?

HOTCHNER (sternly)

Tell the Sheriff we're ready to give the profile.




Till next we meet ...

Ham On Wry

A short time ago, an ebullient co-worker returned from fetching lunch with a breathlessly delighted proclamation:

Her: "I just saw Clint Howard!"

Me: "Where?"

Her: "At the sandwich place around the corner!"

Me: "Was he working there?"

Sammich?

Her: "It was great!"

Me: "So you're happy about it?"

Her: "Yes! Who wouldn't be?!

Me: "I don't know. Probably lots of people. He is a little hard on the eyes."

Her: "True. But he's never on screen for very long!"

Check and mate. I could find no fault in her logic.

Her enthusiasm undimmed, she then flounced happily into her office.

I must admit, I admire anybody who can find joy in the little things. Even if those little things are kinda homely.



Till next we meet ...

Game of Thrones Life Lesson #1

Till next we meet ...

Um ... CNN?

I don't have one of them fancy degrees in "journalism" ... or "zoology" ... buuut ...

You might want to think about double-checking your sources on this one.



Till next we meet ...

Hey, What's That Up There?

What could it be? Dangling so precariously above me on the train during my morning commute ...?

Oh no! The Apple of Damacles!



Till next we meet ...

Channel Suffering

Oh, hey! Look what's on TV!

It's Joss Whedon's 2012 superhero mega-hit! What a delightful surprise! Such a fun movie! Clever writing, appealing performances, great action, terrific effects! The Hulk, Iron-Man, Thor, Captain America ... the whole gang!

Better pop the popcorn and crank up the surround sound! This is gonna be gre--

You're a mean son of a bitch, TV.

A mean, mean son of a bitch.




Till next we meet ...