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Tuesday, June 7, 2011

The Bystanders! They Do Nothing! (Stick Figures in Peril!)


One of the more insidious Perils faced by Stick Figures is also among the least well-known. Because it lurks within the inscrutable and insular heart of Stick Figure society itself.

That Peril? The complete and utter disregard for the health and well-being of other Stick Figures.

According to the latest research, the vast majority of Stick Figures -- an alarming 94.2%* -- will stand impassively by and watch vacantly as a fellow stick figure is fed screaming into the grinding, entrail-caked wheels of a moving train. They will not lift a finger to assist.

Even if they had fingers.

Which they do not.

Is it apathy? A lack of compassion? A psychological inability to empathize with another?

Or are they just jealously resentful of anyone in a swanky, red, business unitard?

We may never know.

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* Studies show that, at any given moment, the remaining 5.8% are actually being fed under the wheels on the other side of the train.


Till next we meet ...

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