Hello, Saturday! I've missed you!
The sweet, sweet aroma of indolence and sloth fills the nostrils.
Surely all is glorious in the world.
But maybe I should consider doing something a bit more ambitious than lazing on the couch, soaking up conditioned air and napping through an unending stream of Forensics Files episodes.
I know, I know. That seems like crazy talk. But it's worth making an effort to at least appear virtuous. Right?
But I can't really think of anything I NEED to do just now ...
Oh.
Right.
The lawn.
Crap.
All right, fine. I'll mow the damn lawn.
Let's see. I think I've got a thing around here you can use for that ... what's it called ...?
Lawnmower! Right.
Let me just yank the cord and--
Crap.
Hmm. Maybe I have another tool I could use for this ...
Too slow.
Any other choices?
Too labor-intensive.
Next?
I don't even know what that means.
What else you got?
Not really practical.
Damn. I guess that means I'm headed to that place where weekends go to die ...
And guess what ... they don't have the part. Not only that, I checked a second Home Depot in my area and they didn't have it either.
Welcome to Sucktown, NJ. Population: Home Depot.
Lowe's to the rescue!
THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!!
I WIN!!
What do you mean I have to take the mower apart and install it now?
Crap.
What do you mean it's too dark out to do anything now?
Double-crap.
(sigh)
Can't wait for tomorrow. When I will feed Sunday to the lawn as well.
Till next we meet ...
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